Rebirth of the Villainous Female Boss - Chapter 504
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Chapter 504: Chapter 478: Too Late (1100+ Monthly Tickets Updated)
“I heard you want to see me?” Xiao Qian pulled a chair and sat in front of him.
“Yes, I want to personally say sorry to you. I should have told you before I went to the mountainous area, but I didn’t have the courage then. And now–”
Li Zhen glanced at his unresponsive legs and said painfully.
“I’ve received my retribution. I think I should be a man and take responsibility for my mistakes. I owe you an apology.”
“Why?” Xiao Qian asked.
“Because I once loved the wrong person who caused you a lot of trouble, and I blamed you. What’s even more helpless is that my mother, for my sake, did so many wrong things to you and my cousins. If one misstep leads to a series of mistakes, then it should start with me, the person who took the first wrong step, to sincerely apologize to you.”
His tone was very sincere.
“Chen Xiaoqian, I’m sorry. Please forgive me for not being able to stand up and bow deeply to you like a man. Everything started because of me, and now I’ve received my retribution. I hope you and my uncle’s family can reconcile with my mother. She’s made many mistakes, but she’s not a bad person. She just loves me too much, but I disappointed her.”
Xiao Qian could tell that Li Zhen’s apology was heartfelt, but she immediately made a judgment that she absolutely couldn’t accept it.
Because if she did, Li Zhen would lose his faith to live.
“Li Zhen, if you really want to be a man, why don’t you bravely live on? Do you think that if you apologize to me, your mother will get better? No, she won’t. Her psychological imbalance will become even worse, and she might go crazy, especially when you’re gone. She won’t have any way out. I admit I really don’t like—it’s sorry to say that bluntly, but I particularly hate your mother. But she doesn’t seem to deserve to die for it.”
Yu Minglang once said that Xiao Qian had a balance in her heart, and she judged everything in the world with her unique standards. She wouldn’t let anyone who bullied her go, but she also wouldn’t lose her bottom line and take revenge on others indiscriminately. She knew how far she should go.
Even if her aunt were disgusting, she shouldn’t die. As for Li Zhen, Xiao Qian couldn’t say she liked or disliked him. Just treat him as a stranger with no connection, and he shouldn’t die either.
“How did you know…I want to commit suicide?” Li Zhen was surprised. How could Chen Xiaoqian see it when his parents didn’t even know about it?
“Don’t forget what I do for a living. I’m a psychologist. Although we have instruments in our field, they are far from as many as those used for treating physical illnesses in hospitals. Most of the time, we make judgments based on here, here, and here.”
Xiao Qian pointed to her eyes, brain, and heart, respectively.
“Alright, psychologist, you’re right. I do have that idea. Don’t tell my parents. As a psychologist, you should understand how painful I am at this moment. If I have to rely on a caregiver to take care of my most basic physiological needs for the rest of my life, every day I live is a day of despair. It’s the best choice for me to leave with dignity.”
Now, Li Zhen was eager to die.
His family was in good condition and could hire caregivers for him for a lifetime. There would be people to support him for the rest of his life, but he would just be living without any dignity. His mind would be clear, but his body couldn’t move. He could only watch helplessly as he became like a baby, defecating and urinating in bed. That was terrifying.
He would lie in bed for the rest of his life, and his father might even buy him a high-end wheelchair. Someone would push him out and then see the strange looks from others. When his wheelchair went far away, people would whisper.
Did you know that Old Li’s child is disabled? I heard he can’t even control his bladder. A grown man, tsk tsk …
He had suffered a lot of discrimination before because of his sexual orientation. He’d had enough of those whispers behind his back. His proud and upright father had already been humiliated because of his sexual orientation. How could he let his parents face more criticisms because of his paralysis?
Xiao Qian understood Li Zhen’s feelings very well because, in her past life, she had treated several similar patients. Some needed Xiao Qian’s treatment after suffering major physical disabilities, helping them accept their reality and imperfect selves.
But some were not like that.
Li Zhen was one of the latter.
Seeing Li Zhen’s desperate expression, Xiao Qian didn’t say any comforting words. Instead, she echoed his views.
“Although our country doesn’t have euthanasia, my attitude towards euthanasia is neutral. I neither support nor oppose it. We should analyze specific circumstances and no one can make the right or wrong judgment for others. As a man, being paralyzed is indeed a very heavy blow. It’s normal for you to have suicidal thoughts. I occasionally come across similar cases, but my heart is in great pain when treating them.”
“Why?” Li Zhen was interested in Xiao Qian’s words. This was the first time since the accident that he felt the impulse to talk to someone. There was a special magic in Xiao Qian that no one could guess her thoughts, but she seemed to know how to make people listen to her words.
Li Zhen didn’t realize that he had become Xiao Qian’s patient.
“Because living is more painful than dying. Really, I’ve seen a high-level paraplegic athlete who tried to cooperate with my treatment and fought against depression time and time again for the sake of his family’s peace of mind. Every time I treated him, I had to drink half a catty of liquor.”
“You drink?” It didn’t look like it, Xiao Qian seemed well-behaved.
“Don’t tell Yu Minglang about this. This is our secret. I’m not an alcoholic, but everyone needs a way to vent their emotions. If I were with Yu Minglang at that time, I wouldn’t need to drink to vent. Our job involves dealing with negative news daily. Although we’re supposed to comfort people’s hearts, sometimes we come across things we can’t solve, and I feel suffocated. Drinking a little helps calm myself down.”
If it were her past life and she were with Yu Minglang, she wouldn’t drink sulkingly. Instead, they would just strip Xiao Qiang naked, laugh, and get on with it. Rolling around and sweating could guarantee a week of good mood.
This was also a method Xiao Qian had learned after breaking her moral barrier, and she felt that Xiao Qiang was very useful.
“If I hadn’t had the accident, maybe we’d still have a chance to be friends. It’s a pity…” At this time, Li Zhen realized that Xiao Qian was not as unattainable, arrogant, and resourceful as he had imagined. She still retained her innocence when dealing with work.
It was too late, though. He wouldn’t have any more friends. He wanted to leave this cruel world.